Dance With My Father

Today is one of those days that has bitter-sweet memories for me, 3rd November. I used to look forward to this day with bated breath, you see I don’t believe in love much, the happily ever after endings for me only exist in fairy tales. But there’s one couple that I truly believed loved each other. They went through many trials, sorrow, happiness and love together. They took their marriage vows seriously even though their children at times thought they were better off apart when insurmountable problems would arise, but somehow they proved them wrong time and again. I came to admire this beautiful couple, not only did they bring me into this world, but they taught me the seriousness of marriage and not the 72 days Kim Kardashian kind of marriage. But the kind of marriage that flourishes with time. My siblings and I came to admire their love, so every 3rd November we would try to outdo each other and make their wedding anniversary as special as possible. It’s what drew us siblings together and the one day that we would all look forward to, baking cakes and planning weekend getaways for them was the least we could do. Seeing my mum so happy as she danced with my father always brought tears of joy to my eyes. The glint in her eyes as she danced with my father I always thought it would last forever, that nothing would ever tear it apart. But as life would have it, that was not going to be the case. The cruel hands of death came and snatched my daddy away from us 5 years ago. Ever since then, 3rd November has become one of those days I always want to end so fast, because it kills me seeing the pain in my mama’s eyes. Today would have been their 35th wedding anniversary, we always planned to throw a big party when they reached this milestone, but alas! That was never meant to be. I’ve never really experienced the kind of love my parents had, that would make me love someone that much, live with someone for that long, endure a whole lot of shit from them sometimes yet sticking with someone through thick and thin so I can’t begin to imagine the pain she goes through every year. Life has its ups and down people, and I’m forever grateful for the good times we had celebrating their love together. Sometimes you just never know what you’ve got till it’s snatched away from you. Never take anything for granted, take some time from your busy schedules to appreciate the love that your parents have and show them how much you appreciate them when they are still alive. Times have changed, it’s not like our parents days when they valued marriage and would put up a straight face for the sake of the kids yet behind closed doors at times their marriage was falling apart. We never value the sanctity of marriage as much as they used to, till death do us apart no longer seems to apply much, but for those who still do, I salute you. I always hope and pray that I will find a love that lasts forever like my parents had, and today of all days I would do anything to have her dance with my father again. The late Luther Vandross song always plays over and over in my head on this day and always brings tears to my eyes..

Back when I was a child
Before life removed all the innocence
My father would lift me high
And dance with my mother and me and then

Spin me around till I fell asleep
Then up the stairs he would carry me
And I knew for sure
I was loved

If I could get another chance
Another walk, another dance with him
I’d play a song that would never, ever end
How I’d love, love, love to dance with my father again

Ooh, ooh

When I and my mother would disagree
To get my way I would run from her to him
He’d make me laugh just to comfort me, yeah, yeah
Then finally make me do just what my mama said

Later that night when I was asleep
He left a dollar under my sheet
Never dreamed that he
Would be gone from me

If I could steal one final glance
One final step, one final dance with him
I’d play a song that would never, ever end
‘Cause I’d love, love, love to dance with my father

Sometimes I’d listen outside her door
And I’d hear her, mama cryin’ for him
I pray for her even more than me
I pray for her even more than me

I know I’m prayin’ for much too much
But could You send back the only man she loved
I know You don’t do it usually
But Lord, she’s dyin’ to dance with my father again
Every night I fall asleep
And this is all I ever dream

Peace and Blessings always,Vionna



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